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210. Love & Monsters

Love & Monsters



An ordinary man called Elton becomes obsessed with the Doctor and Rose and their mysterious blue box. But when Elton’s investigations bring him to the attention of the enigmatic Victor Kennedy, his harmless hobby suddenly plunges him into a living nightmare.


Written by Russell T Davies
Directed by Dan Zeff

The Doctor – David Tennant
Rose Tyler – Billie Piper
Victor Kennedy – Peter Kay
Elton Pope – Marc Warren
Jackie Tyler – Camille Coduri
Ursula Blake – Shirley Henderson
Mr. Skinner – Simon Greenall
Bridget – Moya Brady
Bliss – Kathryn Drysdale
The Hoix – Paul Kasey
Mrs Croot – Bella Emberg


Elton: “That was my family home, down there. I did try, but there’s two women live there now and they’re a bit… severe”

Victor: “No no no no, I don’t shake hands – back, back. I suffer from a skin complaint – Eczeema.”
Elton: “Oh, you mean “eczema”?”
Victor: “Oh, this is worse – much worse – I blister to the touch. Back, back – all of you, further, further. Thank you.”

Elton: “So it began. The impossible task. To scour the mean streets, to search a major capital city for an unknown girl. To hunt down that face in a seething metropolis of lost souls. To find that one girl in ten million. ”
Old Lady: “Oh, that’s Rose Tyler. She lives just down there. Bucknell House, number forty-eight. Her mother’s Jackie Tyler. Nice family. Bit odd…

Mr Skinner: “Oh it’s amazing! You’ve achieved steps one to four in precise order! How did you manage it? ”
Elton: “Well, I had to work very hard. She keeps everything very close to her chest. ”
Ursula: “That’s a hell of a chest.”

Abzorbaloff: “She tastes like chicken”.

Rose: “You upset my mum. ”
Elton: ” … Great big absorbing creature from outer space, and you’re having a go at me?”

Rose: “Is it me or is he a bit… Slitheen?”.
The Doctor: “Not from Raxacorricofallapatorius, are you?”
Abzorbaloff: “No! I’m not the swine! I spit on them! I was born on their twin planet”
The Doctor: “Really? What’s the twin planet of Raxacorricofallapatorius?”
Abzorbaloff: “Klom.”
The Doctor: “Klom?”
Abzorbaloff: “Klom.”

The Doctor: “Elton! Fetch a spade!”

Elton: “It’s a relationship… of sorts… but we manage. We’ve even got a bit of a love life.”

Elton: “But what I wanted to say is… you know, when you’re a kid, they tell you it’s all, grow up. Get a job. Get married. Get a house. Have a kid, and that’s it. Ah. But the truth is, the world is so much stranger than that. It’s so much darker. And so much madder…And so much better.”


This episode takes place in 2007.

The “Abzorbaloff” was designed by nine-year-old William Grantham for a “Design a Doctor Who Monster” competition held by Blue Peter.

Comedian Peter Kay was cast in the role of Victor Kennedy after Kay wrote a fan letter to
Russell T. Davies praising the new series.

Peter Kay was considered for the role of Elton but wanted to play the monster.

Victor says the files on the Doctor are from the Torchwood archive. And also files on Rose were deleted by the ‘Bad Wolf’ virus. A nod to last years central myth.

This episode was shot at the same time as “The Impossible Planet” and “The Satan Pit”, hence the Doctor and Rose only appear for around five minutes.

This episode contains flashback scenes to “Rose”, “Aliens of London” and “The Christmas Invasion”. Most of the scenes had to be newly shot from Eltons perspective.

Featured music: Electric Light Orchestra with ‘Don’t Bring Me Down’ and ‘Mr. Blue Sky’. And Il Divo with ‘Unbreak My Heart‘.

The Who is Doctor Who? website was updated again.